Blessings

I am blessed beyond belief.  More than this sinner deserves.  More than I could ever actually say thank you for.  Being in Africa, I am constantly reminded of this.  Living here for 40 days has shown me that I seriously have so much to be grateful for.  I have things that others may not have, may never have.

For starters:

·      I have parents that support me and help me through every situation.  They are constantly sending me uplifting messages that make my struggles acceptable.

·      I have a sister that sends me scripture via text every morning, regardless of the fact that it cost her to text me.

·      I have a brother-in-law who takes the time out of his crazy hectic schedule to email me about what’s going on in Texas.

·      I have a church family that 100% has my back and has supported every step of this journey.

·      I have friends back home that send me weekly emails, keeping me in the know about their lives, and asking about mine.

·      I have people all over the world praying for me and my job.

·      I have past coworkers that continue to support me and check on my struggles and accomplishments.

·      I have girls in Namibia that remind me why I am here and always show me a good time.

·      I have water to drink (most of the time), food to eat, air to breathe, and a gracious God I get to serve!

If all I was to get from this situation was to realize how blessed I am in life, I would say that this year was successful.  Yes, I want to do more while I am here, but how often do people honestly stop, take the time to count their blessings, and say thank you for them?  This year allows me to do that.  This year allows me to realize that God never leaves me, he never forsakes me.  He is always here.  His son is my rock, because of all people, He knows the struggles I am going through.  The difficulties of fitting in.  The times when nobody understands me.  The situations where I am alone.  I am so thankful that my savior knows the things I am going through.  It makes it that much easier for me to fight through and to know that a year here is doable. 

Vulnerable

Here’s a blog post from last week that I forgot to upload.  Enjoy!

I am vulnerable.  In every possible way, I am vulnerable, and I think that is completely how God planned for this journey to be.  Today, while preparing my files that still don’t make any sense to me, I caught up on some church by listening to old Podcasts of sermons.  In the sermon, Jason said, “God does not call the qualified, but qualifies the called.”  These words are proving to be so true.  I am far from qualified for this job, this life, this experience.  I am still so unsure of the school system, of my teaching, of testing, etc.  This country is foreign, but even more foreign to me is how the schools are run.  I struggle with not being able to have any control, which is something I usually need, something that makes me feel like I am accomplishing something.  I have to keep reminding myself that I was called though.  I was selected into this mission field.  I was sent out into the nations for some reason only God knows.  I have faith that I am here for all of the right reasons, but on certain days, that is easier said than done.  I am not sure why this journey is so difficult for me.  Maybe it’s because I tried to avoid the thought process of not being in Texas for a whole year.  Maybe it’s because I am more of a homebody than I even thought possible.  Maybe it’s just how this experience is for most people.  I long for days that homesickness and loneliness do not overpower my thoughts though.  I long for days when the other teachers actually ask me to spend time with them.  I long for days when my cultural high outshines the lows.

Letter Writing

            Today, I had an incredibly successful 8A class.  I was a little apprehensive given our art fiasco the day before, but these learners are resilient and bounced back as if nothing happened, which makes me so happy since I want to be liked.  Today, I taught them the proper format of a letter.  I showed them where the address goes, the date, how to format the body, opening and closing.  After all of the technical stuff, I gave them two options.  One, we could write a letter to poachers in Namibia about the importance of our animals, or two, we could write a letter to the mayor of Opuwo about our school needs.  They chose the latter, which made me happy, since I knew it would be easier.  I started off the letter, showing them how things would be done, but quickly asked them to share what things needed to be changed.  The learners were so eager to have their voice be heard.  They talked about the food, the hostels, the water, the school condition, etc.  Their energy was contagious and I did not want to leave class.  I wanted to continue writing the letter in order for all of the learners to share what they felt was important.  On Friday, I will collect the letters.  After grading through some, I will definitely be posting some on the blog, but I just wanted to share some uplifting news for now.

Movies and Relaxation

My work has finally begun to slow down, which means I am able to relax, watch some movies, read some books.  It has been a breath of fresh air to have some me time.  I know it will get boring soon, but currently, I am very happy for this change of pace.  Today, I was able to watch Did You Hear About the Morgans?  I haven’t watched that movie in awhile, but I love Sarah Jessica Parker, and anything that takes you to the country.  It was so great to watch some good ole American living, rodeos included.  Gosh I love the rodeo!  And obviously, that led me to think about the fact that I am missing the rodeo this year.  Such a bummer since I know so many great artists are gonna be there.  In other news, I was also able to pick up a little bit of wifi on my netman.  It is by no means good, but just knowing I am one step closer to those I love is heartwarming.  I think if I want to really be able to do anything on it, I will have to learn to disable my pictures.  No idea how to do that, so if you know, send me the deets J

After writing about some of the learners not being motivated, I was presented with one that is completely devoted to his work.  While everyone else was at sports, I was working on classroom visual aids.  The principal requires us to put some up in the room, so I quickly made a poster type thing for each one of my classes.  When I went into 8B, there was one boy working on homework all alone.  He politely greeted me and we discussed what he was doing.  I was seriously so proud of him in that moment because I know his friends and classmates were off having fun and playing, but here he sat, dedicated to getting his work done.  I don’t know his story, but I am proud to be one of his teachers.

Some random Namibian facts/pointers:

·      Be prepared to rarely wash your hands

·      Always have a stash of water in case of water going out

·      Accept that you will look like a scrub for a whole year

·      Realize that everyone in Opuwo may have some idea of who you are, so keep your mouth shut

·      Don’t plan on there being a happy medium.  Namibia is either on one side of the extreme spectrum

·      Know you will always get a headache when around a Himba woman for too long

·      With that being said, you will always know when a Himba is in or has been in a shop

·      Plan to have a “boyfriend” or “fiancé” in every situation with locals, or else, you will be married to the whole village

·      With that being said, wear your ring on your ring finger

·      Get used to people laughing at things that are not funny/do not make sense

·       Prepare for sunsets that only God could create

·      Become ok with wearing the same thing 2-4 days in a row and nobody thinking you are crazy

·      Know that peanut butter is in its own food category on the food pyramid and is perfectly ok for breakfast, lunch, dinner, morning snack, afternoon snack, midnight snack

There will be plenty more to come, but until then.  Peace and Namibz!

Weekly bumps

As a new teacher, I have had to raise my voice a couple of times to get the learners back on task.  Sometimes I feel mean, but with classes this large in classrooms that echo with every small noise made, it is needed and I think expected.  Today however, was different.  It was the first time I actually yelled or seriously raised my voice at a class.  Looking back now, I regret it, but I do not know how I would have changed the situation.  So that you understand, let me share what happened.  I had 8A Arts today during 9^th period.  The learners had started a picture a couple weeks back.  When I arrived to class, I told them to take out the drawing, to finish it, to borrow my colors, and to turn it in before they left.  I even made the comment that if they lost it, they needed to start over and still turn it in.  Throughout the class, students were working.  Some were already finished and were able to start other homework, but still, others were working on their art.  I periodically asked if they were doing ok, and briefly walked around to check up on them.  At the end of the class, learners turned in their work.  However, there were a couple boys that had done nothing.  They had “lost” their work and had not bothered to restart the assignment.  To say I was mad was probably an understatement.  I wasn’t just mad, I was irritated, I felt disrespected, and I was angry at their lack of motivation.  And lack of motivation is exactly what a lot of it is.  These learners have excessive amounts of study opportunities, but yet I am not receiving homework from half of the class.  I know this happens in America, but I was always a student to turn in everything on time.  I am not sure if the situations are arising because I am new and they see me as easy, but I have been recording all of their grades and keeping track of everything they do.  I also don’t know if this is just their individual work ethic.  Maybe they act like this in every class.  Who is to say?

In other news, I am struggling with constantly being told to do things.  I do not think learners have been taught to form a question outside of the classroom.   “Miss, give me water.  Miss, I am hungry.  Miss, give me a dictionary.  Miss, give me cooking oil.  Miss, let me see your pictures.  Miss, I am coming to watch a movie tomorrow.”  My thoughts…Miss um excuse me?!  Again, I’m not sure how to handle this situation.  I honestly only have enough resources for myself.  I have let learners “borrow” stuff and have not had it returned.  I have lent a helping hand, which leads to helping everyone.  That is the hardest part.  I know that these learners are hungry and hot and thirsty, but there are 400 of them, and only one of me.  I don’t have the money to help all of them, so it really isn’t right for me to do some of this stuff for any of them.  I don’t really see the learners going to the other teachers, but I may be wrong.  Maybe they are asking and I am oblivious.  This situation extends to more than just the learners though.  I have had teachers do similar things.  “Miss Mac, give me your marking pen.”  Thoughts, suggestions, and prayers pertaining to this situation are greatly appreciated!

Lastly, the water is out again and my toilet is broken.  Thank the Lord for that outhouse or my house would be a disgusting, smelly mess.  With a bajillion people using our toilet that is incapable of flushing, it is 100% clogged and nobody, including myself has taken the time to fix it.  I avoid that bathroom like the plague it is so gross to me, so I would rather use the outhouse than attempt to fix the toilet.  As for the water, I guess I need to just get used to that going out weekly.  It usually comes back on within the day, so that’s not too awful.  During these times, I awkwardly take a bucket shower and savor every drop of water I have in my fridge.  It is also beneficial to have canned food items in stock all the time, since cooking can get limited during these days/hours.

Well, that’s all for today.  I am hoping Thursday and Friday go by quickly and I can get into Opuwo as soon as possible to see all of my friends.  I am counting down the class periods until I’m there.  Only 10 to go!

All my love,

Tay

P.S.  The principal kept “praising” me for being the only one ever on time and for handing in all of my preparation forms.  It’s nice to get some approval, but I’m not sure the other teachers are digging it. 

Tuesdays are from God

Tuesdays are a God given day.  Today, it rained for the first time.  Not a light sprinkle, but a nice African downpour.  It was beautiful.  From the soccer field, you could see the clouds move in slowly.  The temperature dropped drastically, a good 10 degrees.  The wind circled around, causing the sand to pick up in a spiral.  A light sprinkle arrived.  And then, out of nowhere, the heavens opened and it rained a glorious rain.  It was exactly what I needed to make this day even better.

Somehow, I managed to get out of my big funk from yesterday.  The learners were competing in their internal sports competition and I went to watch and help.  The little things move me so much here.  Literally move me to tears.  As my 18-20 year old boys competed in the 3000m run, I sat predicting the winner.  I chose one based on appearance.  Athletic legs, and an owner of actual running shoes.  He was a strong runner, no doubt, but the amazing thing is, he wasn’t the winner.  He came in second.  The winner was an underdog if you based it on image.  He’s tall and skinny, but instead of running attire, he had on his uniform pants, a cut-off shirt, and no shoes.  To see this happen really can’t be explained.  The emotions are overwhelming and I was literally tearing up as he finished his last lap.  These children are racing barefoot.  They are running in sand that others throw glass bottles onto.  They are fighting to show they are capable of winning too.  They are fighting for a place in this world, and I can only hope that they know there is one for them.

With all of that being said, the week is moving by pretty slowly.  I keep thinking it is Wednesday and that I am halfway finished with the week and will get to see my Oshana friends soon, but in reality, it is still Tuesday, and I still have 16 more periods to teach.  So far, the lectures are going well this week.  However, the homework assignments are a different story.  My learners have a hard time thinking for themselves and understanding directions.  They are not good at forming opinions on their own, or even thinking creatively.  They are stuck in this rut, which is far from their own fault.  I am trying to slow the pace of the classroom down though.  I am trying to encourage them to think differently, to not just use their brains when they think, but their whole body and their heart.  It is hard though.  I find myself frustrated, and wondering what I am doing wrong.  I am asked to explain words that honestly are so simple that they are hard to explain without using the actual word.  It is a learning process though, and if I only improve a handful of learners’ grades, I will be satisfied.

I received a text from my dad today, which started my day off beautifully.  It’s from Parkway: “We are all asked to do more than we can do.  Every hero or heroine of the Bible does more than he or she would have thought is possible to do.  Keep the faith!”

The Silver Lining

I am literally sitting on my bed as a goat baahhhs non-stop outside of my window.  Is this really my life?  Apparently so!  I wake up in the middle of the night to animals making crazy noises all the time.  Some you’d think were dying, others are having a little too much fun for their own good.  The students seriously wouldn’t even need sex education because it is happening all around them in the form of wildlife.  I have seen donkeys getting it on in almost every town I have been in.

Besides donkeys, this week has been miraculously so much better.  I didn’t have to work on Monday due to the fact that I had to go to Oshakati with Ashley and Mailin to get our tax ids.  The drive there was quick, but our driver decided to take his time on the way home.  Buttons were pushed.  Depressing love songs were played as loud as they could be for 6 hours.  Cars were switched because they were “broken”.  Heated words were exchanged to make him move faster.  But yet, we still had about 5 extra hours put onto our trip thanks to him.

Tuesday, I was ready to get back to my learners and teach.  My school is so on top of some stuff, like paperwork and things they want to happen.  However, we found ourselves starting all over again when it came to the time-table.  My schedule has changed numerous times and although it has been incredibly frustrating, my parents keep reminding me that I need to be like a duck.  I’m seriously thinking of getting a duck tattooed on my head, hand, body, just to remember that I need to be a duck.  I need to let things roll off of my back.

As far as my learners, some of them are really beginning to like me a lot!  My grade 7 and 8 learners are awesome.  They are so intrigued by my life and I am of theirs too.  Several girls have told me that they want to show me their homes and their families.  I would absolutely LOVE to meet their families and see how and where they live.  I know some are in the locations, but others are in small homestead like places.  The boys are another story.  They are so close to my age, so I can see their flirty side trying to come out.  I constantly feel like I am teaching high school, but in reality, it is only 8^th grade.

In other news, our water went out again this week.  That was the third time in two and a half weeks.  I’m sure that has to be some kind of record!  Because of no water, I tackled my first bucket shower last night.  It was not a pretty site, but it got the job done and I was clean enough to go to work the next day.  I am also on hostel supervision this week, which includes supervising meals, study, and bedtimes.  There are three of us on duty though, so therefore I am able to skip some stuff and go to Opuwo for part of the weekend.  Lastly, my 8^th grade classes and I wrote “About Me Intros” this week.  I read mine aloud and they had to practice listening and answering questions about what they heard.  I collected their work and was able to read everything they shared.  These kids are seriously awesome! I cannot emphasize that enough.  They talked about how they don’t have a lot of money, but are so thankful for their parents, they told me they believe in Jesus and always want to follow Him, and they shared crazy information like their dad has five wives and 28 children.  This country is unique, but awesome.  I am blessed and challenged each day I am here!