I've been wanting to sit down for awhile and put into words some of my return. As of tomorrow, I will start my 10th day back in America. In a lot of ways, it feels like I never left, but then when I look around me and witness all of the changes that have taken place, it is very apparent that I was gone for a LONG time. Many of you may know this, but Texas is a booming state. For the most part, the economy is still in decent/good shape. With that said, Houston and Sugar Land are constantly continuing to develop. I have returned home to new roads, new stores, new apartment complexes, etc. It is such a drastic change that at one point I looked at my mom and asked, "where are we?!" She was either entertained or a little concerned with my lack of directional skills.
Being back home has been great so far, but I won't sugarcoat this for y'all (why start now?), it is difficult. When I'm at the house with my family I am at ease. However, being with my blood family reminds me of the Namibian family (brothers/sister, learners, etc) that I left behind. On most days I have this feeling that something is missing. That I'm not totally complete at this moment. I have the four most important people sitting next to me, but other important people are miles and miles away. I can only attribute that feeling to my Namibian life that I left behind.
As for the difficulties that I have faced so far... HOLIDAY SEASON MADNESS! The difficulties definitely started the minute I said goodbye to all of the other volunteers that I flew home with. For starters, JFK is a madhouse during the Christmas season. Coming from the village, heck even from Cape Town, I was NOT ready for that. People were everywhere. They were in a hurry. They didn't want me to greet them and make small talk. They were REALLY fancy. I felt small, scared, and a little unsure about what was ahead. Getting to Texas got some of that edge off, but there have been moments that I've questioned things happening around me.
During orientation, our Field Director shared a story about his first return back to the States. He had visited the grocery store and was so overwhelmed with the orange juice selection that he walked right out. I've definitely had similar moments, but for the most part I've just been following mom around like a lost, small child. One day I ventured out with Amanda and Mark though, which is when I had my first overwhelming can't function moment. We decided to go to Chick fil A. Since leaving, Chick fil A has added the caloric information for all of their food. When we entered the store, I was so taken back by this. On top of that, I couldn't find what I needed. As I approached the counter (Amanda and Mark had already ordered), I was baffled and spitting words randomly at everyone because I didn't know where my option was and on top of that, I had to order an extra drink for my mom. To say I was a hot mess would be an understatement. The boy behind the counter seemed concerned with my behavior. Amanda had a "rub some dirt on it" kind of attitude happening. Mom laughed her butt off when I told her the story later.
All in all, being home is going great! I'm excited for all of the things ahead of me. I'm thankful for such a rewarding year and for a family that allowed me to peace out for a year.
Many have asked about what is to come next... My response? I wish I knew! As of right now, I'm planning to take off at least a month to readjust, do some job searching, work on the resume, and acclimate back to American life. If any of you blog readers out there know of any Communications positions that may be available, throw them my way.
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