Dear High School Me

This weekend I had the opportunity to go through a bunch of boxes that were packed up during the move.  I guess I have always been a person who writes out my emotions, because what do you know, I discovered all kinds of writing samples of mine from middle school and high school.  Sadly, I’m embarrassed to say that 95% of them were regarding some boy who “broke my heart” or was “confusing me.”  If I dated you from the ages of 13 to 17, there’s probably some journal full of scribbles about you and our relationship.  If not that, there was probably a stack of letters from my girlfriends giving me suggestions on what to do.  They were humorous, but just a little bit sad and desperate, which got me thinking. 

What would I have told my high school self in these situations?

First, pull yourself together.  Yes, break-ups are painful and they always will be, but any boy who is going to hurt you that badly probably isn’t a boy you want to be with for a long time.  Any boy who is confusing you enough for you to fill pages and pages with your emotions probably does not care about you to the same extent, so you should reconsider why you are making such a big deal about him.

On top of that, the future you is going to realize that none of these boys were really quite what you were looking for.  They may have filled your high school days with laughter and fun, but the woman you will turn out to be is going to be looking for much bigger things in a relationship.  You will be seeking more unique qualities.  

A God-loving man. A man who will not run in trying times. An adventure junky. A man moved by missions. A man who has a heart for orphans. A man who enjoys snuggling up with a good book. A man who loves animals. A man who truly accepts your family and wants to be a part of it.

You will one day move beyond the cute athlete and the musician, although those things will still make you swoon from time to time.  

If high school Taylor was to come to me crying and asking for help today, I would stop her and ask her if she has taken it to the Lord.  Have you prayed about the situation?  And not to bring said boy back, but for clarity and acceptance?  Afterwards, I would suggest that she not only pray for this new ex-boyfriend's future relationships, but for her own.  I would tell her to fervently pray for her future husband and his walk with the Lord.  Pray for the man that has already been set aside for you, the man that God knows will be the one to complete you.  There's something beautiful about the thought of marrying a man you were praying for before even meeting him.

Lastly, I would tell high school Taylor that in the future she probably won't date for years because there are other things in life that are weighted more heavily at that stage in her life.  She will be distracted by ruins in exotic locations, languages, children in Africa, and airports.  Because of that, I'd probably tell her to grab a notebook and head to Barnes and Noble.  Go to the travel section and go crazy!  Choose a location, learn as much as possible about the culture: food, traditions, clothing, top sites.  Then, save up that money and go!  Grab your girlfriends, your sister, or your mom, and explore another culture.

Live.  Don't let some boy keep you from truly living.